The Things That Count: What Really Matters Is...

Last week, we kind of went through some pragmatic sorts of things, but if you didn't get a hold of that, you might want to take a look at it. Some of it is some stuff that not only is it going through some relevant materials, but particularly some warnings and like, for example, in the current insurance environment. Today, we want to go through one. It's entitled The Things That Count, What Really Matters Is.

Does everybody have one? We need to get a set to you if you don't. You're covered? Everybody covered on that? Okay. What we'll be doing is going over kind of miscellaneous subjects, several subjects that are related, building on the things that we've already laid out, okay? And then we'll kind of come to a summary at the end of that. So at any rate, put on your seatbelt, put on the helmets, and let's get through it here.

The first question is, biblically, when should a wife work outside the home? Obviously, this is not one that today's feminists would have any sort of inclination to ask. The reason why we ask this question is that Scripture puts it this way. Scripture doesn't give you some sort of a dictate, women must work in the home, that sort of thing.

But what Scripture does is encourages in the direction. of a wife, particularly a mother, not working outside the home or at least, let me put it this way, focusing their efforts and energies and time on being a wife and being a mother because that is going to take a lot. It's going to require a lot. Here's something else that I think is important about that emphasis that comes out of Titus 2, 3 through 5 there. And that's that it says that being a wife and a mother is important.

Our society is not communicating that message. Would you agree? Our society is not communicating that message. And it's pushing anything else. For those in the church to reinforce and encourage and to just say it flat out that what wives and mothers are doing and taking care of those kids is extremely important. and that that is a valuable message. And it needs to be continually communicated because, frankly, the world is telling our ladies that it doesn't matter. Scripture says the exact opposite. So we need to pick what we're going to listen to here. And so the Church has a place in reinforcing that.

Now, so the question What we run into here, this is really ultimately for a married woman, especially one who has kids at home. But I would suggest out of scripture that these be some considerations that you look at. I'm going to go down the bullets that are on page 52 there. The first one is the woman should have a desire to work and her husband agrees that this is wise for the sake of the family. One of the reasons why this is a husband and wife kind of issue is just because of the oneness principle and because of the headship principle, that those two put together are going to point in this direction, that the husband and wife are together.

Otherwise, you're going to have a constant tension and pulling over this issue. So that would be one criteria. It's not the only one. Let's look at the next one down. The basic functions of her primary role, and I think that again says what's important, her primary role is a wife and a mother should not suffer as a result.

And frankly, that's going to be a challenge if those hours get to be very great, isn't it? It's going to be tough. Those need to be carefully weighted and realistically weighed, because it's really easy to talk in the realm of fantasy, I'll do this, that, and the other thing. But the reality is that it can be tough. And it's especially tough if you have younger kids. And I would even say if you have a part-time situation in the home, it can be tough.

I'll share an instance that Nancy and I had, and Nancy knows what I'm talking about. Nancy was doing medical transcription, and she did a great job. They liked the work that she was doing and said keep it up and all that. But our kids kind of kept dropping little hints that they weren't real happy with this arrangement. Finally, Nancy and I talked it over and said, you know, maybe we better cut this out. You know, it's not essential to our survival here, and so maybe we better just end it. And we were amazed at the almost instantaneous change in our kids. I'm sorry, I wasn't listening, but I missed the point. Okay.

Yeah, well, the point being that you need to look real carefully is, is this work outside of the domestic concerns, is that having an impact on the kids? And Nancy, I don't know, maybe you have some things to share, to add to that, or... Well, I just found that our seventh child's attention level... What age was it? Actually, Randy was about 17 when I quit working, which would mean he had 16 infections as well. And his attention level just deflated. He calmed down a little bit. It took him about two weeks, but I just saw that calm down.

And Becky, whomever it was, did some stuff that made her much more affectionate, because I was there with her. I might add that I talked to my sister last night, who has a 15-year-old and a 15-year-old, and she is modeling, but she said, I find that teenagers need to be around more than toddlers.

How about that? Interesting, huh? Thank you. The next consideration is the extra income should not be feeding a debt problem. And I bring this up for this point. Statistics show that two-income couples tend to have a higher, and I don't mean just slightly, but they have a higher level of debt than one-income couples. And the rationale is this. Frequently, two-income couples will say, well, we've got more income. Therefore, we can justify a higher debt payment.

So they just get themselves in deeper. So rather than getting ahead in any financial sense, what they do is they just dig the hole deeper because they've got more income. So it's real important to look realistically and very honestly at the situation to make sure that it's not just feeding a debt problem, not just making you get deeper in the hole, because the extra income can very easily get rationalized to just justify a higher debt load if you're not careful.

This is where it comes back to the issues we talked about the first couple of weeks, where, you know, is material your god? Have you swallowed this world's myths? And you need to kind of take a look at that before jumping into this situation. I put the last point there, if the husband is working, which should be the case if he's able to do so, the wife's income is, and I would say this is advisedly, this isn't something that I would say Scripter spells out explicitly, but advisedly used for things that are not essential for the survival of the family, but somehow related more to, for example, saving or providing for a longer term need. a family would be best off to depend upon the husband's income for the primary survival day-to-day kind of needs and look to the wife's income, assuming all those prior issues say, yes, it's okay, that the income is looked to as providing for something that's supplemental and perhaps longer term.

What happens, especially if a couple says, okay, we've got two incomes now, let's go out and get more debt. They just increase their standard of living to a point where now she can't back off. And even if you decided this isn't something we want to do anymore, like Nancy and I decided, they get into a place where they're locked in. They can't do it without some radical change in lifestyle.

So something to be thought through there. So there are some biblical justifications, if you will, for some of the extra income sources in case you decide that that's a worthwhile and positive thing to do. Okay, shifting subjects again here. Homework, church, and life in general. Now this is something that for the first 15 years of our marriage I got way wrong. And so I bring this up because it's a critical point It's something also that if you've learned it once, you'll still have to keep re-evaluating it. Nancy and I, even this last week, were sitting down and saying, you know, we need to look at this issue.

But I think there are some biblical priorities, and that's one principle we'll look at. Biblical priorities. And then the other is the time principle. Biblical priority principle and the time principle. The first set here I'll have with married folks, especially with children, would look like this. Number one would be, in terms of priorities, relationship with the Lord. Secondly, relationship with the spouse. And thirdly, relationship with the children at home. Relationship with extended family, and then with the church, and then the society, including the government.

One of the things that is interesting here, and a story I told in the Wednesday night gathering, is this. I talked to one couple and they said, you know, it was real interesting. We have our little girl and she's just a few years old. And we were all sitting down on the couch. We were like, you know, watching a movie or something. And the little girl looked over and she, you know, saw mom and dad and she got up out of her seat and got over and took their hands and put them together and then got back in her seat.

What's she doing? She's saying, I want to see this priority. Isn't that something? Kids want to know they're important, but even beyond that, they need to know that mom and dad love each other. So that's why that priority fits there. They need to know that mom and dad love each other. That's where they're going to learn love. That's where they're going to learn security.

Notice, if you step into a single person's biblical priorities, You've got a similar list, but the second and third ones are going to drop out here. And the situation becomes simpler. You don't have the spouse and the kids to deal with in the priority list, do you? And one of the reasons that both our Lord and Paul address this issue of singleness, and I want to bring it up here, in Matthew 19 is one passage And this is interesting, he's talking about marriage, and yet he adds this kind of supplement to it in chapter 19, verse 12.

For there are eunuchs, and that's basically a way of saying those who are single, and are committed to singleness, there are eunuchs who are born that way from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who are made eunuchs by men, and there are also eunuchs who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. He was able to accept this, let him accept it. Now, he's basically stating three categories.

Those who are eunuchs from birth, and that might be somebody who's got a medical issue that says, hey, me getting married just doesn't work. It may also include those who maybe have physical or mental incapacities where just getting married is not a good option.

Then, this is those who were made that way by men. Obviously, in ancient times, they would say, okay, you're in charge of the harem, you know, great, you've got all this authority, but what would they do? They would castrate them, okay? We don't do too much of that these days, but what we do have is people may have illness or accidents, or something that comes along in life that is similar to this.

You weren't born that way, But something may happen to make it say, no, getting married is not an option for me. But notice that our Lord puts a third category in there, and that aside from someone who may be born, or even by reason of accident or illness, there's someone who may be born in a position where getting married is not the option for them, there's a third one, and that is there may be singleness for the sake of the Lord. That person, and this is what Paul addresses in 1 Corinthians 7. 1 Corinthians 7, he kind of alternates between the singleness and married issue. And so I've picked a few of them out here, out of chapter 7, that I think zero in on the point that Paul's making about singleness.

So let's read that. But this I say by way of concession, not of command, yet I wish that all men were even as I myself am, single. However, each man has his own gift from God, in this manner and another in that. But I want you to be free from concern. One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord that he may please the Lord. That is, he is not dealing with the issues of the wife and kids. Now notice something. Singleness, what does he call it here? What is singleness? It's a gift. And what about being married? What is that? A gift. Both of them are gifts, okay?

And so I think it's an interesting thing just to observe that, that the Lord has different people in different stations and conditions, and that's going to impact their priority list. Now, alongside the priority principle is also going to be what we're calling here the time of life principle. And you see this with this arrow there.

Children are told in Scripture, and we see that in Ephesians chapter 1, to obey their parents, right? The next step in life then is, and this assumes marriage, being parents. And then the next step in life is caring for parents. And so we go through these stages. And scripture has some things that address each one of those stages, right?

So you put these two together and what we end up seeing is we've got these kind of pair of principles, the priority principle and this time and life principle. And what's going to happen is this time and life principle is going to end up shifting through time how we deal with the priorities.

There was a time, in fact just a little over two years ago, we were in Carson City and Nancy's mom was there in Carson City and she needed us and there wasn't any other family in Carson City. Nancy and I just You know, we needed to stay in Carson City, aside from any other considerations, for the sake of caring for her mom. And that was the right thing to do. And then a period of time came, you know, October of a couple of years ago, when the Lord just said, no, we're changing all this, you know. And so, you know, this is one of these, you know, time of life issues that comes along. And what's interesting, just about the time the kids are moving out, the issues with the parents start coming up. And it'll vary from one couple to the next. But that is going to pull on your priorities. It has to.

And that's something we'll talk about a little bit more as we get through here. But we want to bring this up because that's the big picture. And I think it doesn't give us some sort of cookie cutter answer for here's how we do it in every situation. But we have those things to work with. We know that those time of life issues are there, and we can anticipate them to some extent. Life will hand us surprises perhaps, but we can anticipate them to some extent. And then we've got the relationship priorities to help us sort out, not where do we cut it off, because we know that we can't just say, well, sorry, you're cut off.

But simply say, where do I put my focus here? Okay. Should I start a business? How do I start a business? That's a topic that's way too big for us to answer this afternoon. And aren't you glad I'm not going to try? Okay. What I do intend to cover there is spiritual issues and biblical issues that come up if you're looking at starting a business. I know we've got more than one person in the church who is currently in the stage of asking that question, and others who have done it. I myself have been through the process. First of all, just to ask the question, is having your own business biblical?

And some of the answers that we can have, how about our Lord? We don't have lots of detail on it, but Jesus was the son of a carpenter, and in those days That meant that's what he did. And one of the areas where it is, I'll call it a fitting speculation.

Why is it that Jesus only started his ministry about age 30? It may have been since we don't hear anymore about Joseph after the time when Jesus was about 12 years old at the temple. He suddenly just drops off the scene altogether. No more mention of him.

It may be that our Lord had to work in order to support the family until all the kids were raised. So that may be what had taken place there. Nonetheless, Nazareth was a small town. Probably Joseph and then Jesus was the only carpenter in town. It was small enough that that's the likely situation.

How about Paul? What was Paul? What did he do? Tent maker. As a matter of fact, we have a reference here in Acts 20.34 that implies that he had other people helping him. So maybe he even had a kind of small business going. And that's interesting for him to do that and kind of move around. He may have got Timothy, Titus, and other guys helping him with this process.

So, it is biblical to have a small business. It's not mandated. Aren't you glad? Here's some questions I think to ask, and each of these are biblical questions. Can I do this business as unto the Lord? You see that from Colossians? Can I do it as unto the Lord? Is this going to be something that's just going to grab me and just pull me off in some direction that it's me doing it, it's flesh?

So that's one question to ask. The next one, if married, is this consistent with the oneness principle and the headship principle? If I'm going to venture off on this thing, is this going to cause a tension between myself and my spouse, or is this going to fit? Is this something where the oneness principle fits, and is it something where the headship principle fits, as the husband is in cooperation and agreement and harmony with this?

The third question, can it be done as a part of ministry to my family and to others, to whom I have obligations and not displace those ministries. That's a question actually even for anybody who's out in a work situation, isn't it? My working is a ministry to my family. If it gets to the place where it's displacing ministry to my family, just taking it all over, then there's a problem, isn't there?

So, in balance. The next one, will this business place me in a yoke with unbelievers? And one of the questions that came up at Wednesday is, oh, isn't that just about marriage? Actually, look at the context there of the passage where it talks about the yoke in 2 Corinthians 6. It actually doesn't even mention marriage. It just says in various contexts, we need to ask the question, am I in a yoke with unbelievers? Think of what a yoke did in those days.

They would pair up, like for example, a pair of oxen. What you would not want to do is do like an ox and a horse. because they have a different height, they have a different gait, and they would chafe each other and be constantly fighting. You want a pair that are working together. A believer and an unbeliever are going to work from two entirely different worldviews. They're going to be working from two entirely different spiritual foundations.

So, an important question to ask there. Now, as for how one starts a business, there are also many things to consider, but the key things to consider are with the key priority relationships we've brought up before. Here's where those priorities come in.

What does the Lord think of this? That is, what does His Word have to say? We're not really left guessing about those kinds of things. We can turn to His Word to understand what does the Lord think of this business? What does my spouse think of this if I have one?

If you're a single person, obviously it doesn't fit. But that's going to fit in with item number two above. What do or will my children think of this? Obviously, you're not going to look at them for business counsel, necessarily. But what you're going to be looking at is, what's this telling them? What message does this send to them? So a good question. And it's the question Nancy and I face, where we said, what's the impact on our kids here? What are they trying to tell us? Can I start this business with diligent plans?

That's the Proverbs 21.5 principle there. You know, just kind of launching as a sort of a wild skyrocket, no way to do things. And so planning, you know, and being diligent about it, pursuing it that way.

The next one, am I willing to receive counsel in areas where I do not have knowledge and or experience? There's none of us that knows everything, right? So it's a question of saying, okay, I'm pursuing this because I have background and experience in these areas, but perhaps I won't have all of what's required. So I need to get help. Am I willing to receive counsel or am I just going to struggle with that? So just an important question to answer.

If we're in a business situation already as an employee, typically what's happening is hopefully the management is filling in those areas. If you're running the show yourself, You're going to need to do that. And if you don't have the background that it takes, you'll need to get that background in place. OK.

The priority motivation for whether you're business or employment is provision. And it's important to remember that. People can start off business going off with all sorts of motivations. Well, I'm going to really make a name for myself. I'm going to make millions of bucks. All sorts of other motivations can enter in if we're not careful. Whereas scripture puts it this way, it's a provision priority. You're going to be looking at provision for the family, and that's where it fits in. Other things may enter in, but that had better be, you know, right up there. You're providing. Okay.

Now, another subject here. We're shifting gears again, but this actually shifts back to this time of life issue. Do I need a will or a trust and what else? How do I do these and how often? Okay. Back in the time that New Testament was being written, we do actually have some wills. They would write up wills and things of that sort and have those as legal records.

But we've got some issues that have come up in our day that make things a bit more complex than they were back then. And so one of the things that come up here is, we're told, and 1 Timothy seems to come up with some consistent messages here, to provide for one's own. Another one is just, and this is out of the characteristics of elders, the character of elders, is to manage their own household, okay?

And to deal properly with things here on earth, realizing that we're not going to be here forever, okay? There is a time. when this is all done. And that's part of this arrow that we showed earlier. Time of life principle. Some time will come, things are going to change.

Unless the Lord raptures us all, there's going to be some issues here. And guess what? Even if we're raptured, there's going to be a whole bunch of unbelievers here saying, well, I sure wish this guy had a will or something to tell us what to do with this stuff.

So, based on the above, Married or not, children or not, there are four documents that are recommendable to have in place. And if you have a specific situation, maybe more. I've talked to people who, for example, they have either a child who is going to grow up where they're going to need continuous supervision, maybe even as they go into adulthood.

So that can be an issue. You may have other situations. But this is a general across-the-board case here to look at. One is a health care power of attorney so that someone can make health care decisions if you're not able to. And that one is key. Otherwise, what happens, it can get really complex. I don't know, Bob, you've probably come across all sorts of situations in that category.

Parallel to that is a financial power of attorney. Usually, if you are still alive but not able to make decisions for yourself, you're also going to need a financial power of attorney so that if your disability is not done and over with in a few days, somebody else can handle things. And it may be the same person, but at least you have the situation so that you've got it, so it's easily taken care of.

The next one is a living will, and that's to tell others your preferences with regard to certain, you know, I want this done, that done, I want this not done, etc. with regards to medical procedures in the instance where that person cannot tell you what they want. And then the last thing is either a will or a trust and pour over will, one of those two. And that's to direct how things are handled in the event of your death. Those four documents could save all kinds of trouble.

I've had a conversation with one attorney who says, boy, there's been an awful lot of times when I wish we could call a husband or a wife back just for a few minutes and ask them a few questions. The only thing is, that's real hard to do. I haven't run into an attorney yet that can do that.

So you need these in place. Some of the ways you can get it done, there's things like this. You can get a Quicken family lawyer or something like that. There are ways that you can get these things done. If you have a situation that is complicated, it may be complicated because of a special situation you're in.

It may be complicated because of maybe tensions in the family. If there's any sort of disharmony or things of that sort, you probably better see an attorney on it. If you feel uncomfortable about something, you probably better see an attorney. If you have questions that you're not getting answers to anywhere else, you probably better see an attorney.

Nonetheless, in our era, in our legal and social and medical environment, these are some real essential documents. If you are single, it is almost more important to have these. Not that I'm saying it's not important for those who are married. It's almost more important because frequently the legal position is that spouses are often considered to be able to step into situations and make decisions often without legal challenge. But a person who is single won't have that advantage, assuming it's an advantage. And if you get in a position of contest, a married person may even have some trouble with that. So anyway, these are critical. And one of the things I would suggest is, while you can, talk to your family about these things.

It's no good to just have the documents and then but to have nobody know about them. Example, do the people that you have given these powers of attorney and various authorities, do they know that they have that? Do they have copies of it? I would suggest getting copies in different places. Not only do you keep a copy, but the person that you've given these powers has a copy. And other key people in your family know who these people are and where the document is.

Those are questions that need to be answered because if you have them and it's your own little private event, that won't do any good. So they need to be available, there needs to be understanding and communication among those in the family as to where these are and what's supposed to happen. One of the reasons why I suggest talking about it, beyond even just the person that you've given the authority to, What can easily happen is that that person, as responsible as they may be, may not end up being the first one to get the call.

Maybe that person is off on some vacation at the moment or something of that sort. So it's best if the family knows in general, okay, this person's got it, they've got the documents, they know what's going on. Otherwise, you end up with a period of uncertainty and then what you have in mind won't happen. And unfortunately, it can get real backed up.

Yes? Question. Are copies good enough? Does it have to be the official signed document? On these things, what you'll want to do is look at the particular situation you've got. Typically what will happen is that you'll make multiple originals for different situations and then whoever you're dealing with, like a hospital, a doctor's office, whatever, will want a copy of it for their records. But you want to have originals so that you're not, you know, calling it into question. So typically what will happen is you'll have multiple originals made at the time you're making them.

And by the way, a great place to have them witnessed is at a church, because there's people you know and have known for a while and can trust, but they're not related to you, typically. or at least you can find people that aren't, and that way you're in a good spot to get people to sign it and a bunch of people gathered at once, which otherwise is hard to gather those kinds of people at one time.

Did that answer your question? Would you have them have a notarized copy of the original? We come here and I have ten copies signed. So along those lines, my question was, is a copy executable? In other words, can somebody execute what is in these copies? I think you want to look at an original. I think you want to look at an original. Even though it's a copy of an original. When I say copies, I'm just saying originals.

So what you'll typically do, and the bottom line is, if you get this, that's one way to do it. If you go through a lawyer, they're going to do it similarly. You're going to get multiple originals, and then whoever is going to act off of that will typically want a copy of your original for their file. but you're going to want to have originals to deal with.

Yes, that's a good way to put it. You're going to have people signing, I'll sign this one, and this one, and this one, and the notary. If there's a notary, and by the way, not all these documents may require it, but if there's a notary, they're going to need to do all those so that Anybody who is needing to come in and act on the basis of that document isn't having something disputed by saying, well, that's a copy or you could have phonied that up or something of that sort.

I'm sorry, yes. If you deal with a lawyer, you will insist that he has no right to do it. Yes, right. Yes. And he goes through all these procedures. But he will definitely have in his office an original. Right. Yeah, if you go to an attorney, aside from the advice that they give you, they will also keep files of these things. And that's one kind of supplemental benefit that you have, that you know that somebody has an original. Good point. Good point.

One thing to note is if someone has a very simple estate and they want to write handwrite their will. There are certain legal requirements for that also, and you would want to check with someone, an attorney, or I guess that would be... Yeah, these things vary by state law, and you want to make sure you're up to date with it. I would be inclined to be careful about that.

And here's why. You go to something like this and one of the things they do ask you right off is what state are you in? And I don't know if Office Depot is really making a list and checking it twice. I really don't know if they're fine-tuning that. The other thing is if there is a change in some of the statutes or something impacting the document you've come up with and they're not on top of it, that could be a problem. Typically you register for these and they notify you if there's been an update or a change or you can download an update. You go to an attorney, obviously he's going to be current with the update. So that's the one thing, you want to make sure it fits the state that you're in and you want to make sure that it is current according to the most recent legislation and court cases.

Dave. Do you know if, let's say you do want to ask for Colorado since you're living here now, forget about it because you know you have that box checked off, move to another state later on, thinking that you're still covered. Are you not covered? You may, you could have problems.

And that's one thing I want to take a look at is, and especially, let's say you've got a situation where you've got property in several different states, you could end up with some issues. And that's why I say if you've got a situation that's complex, You'd better see an attorney on it. If you've got questions about it, you'd better see an attorney. If you can't sleep at night, you'd better see an attorney. This is one of those things where you don't want to be wondering and you don't want to come afterwards and say, oops. You want to hit off problems, not cause one. Now, here's the next one. This relates to questions we've already been dealing with.

What is my responsibility to children and to parents as the years go by? Now, it would be an understatement to say that life goes through changes over time. And that's this time of life principle that comes into place. What happens from the beginning to the end has many possible turns, but we want to make some generalizations here that fit.

In the area of finances, parents have responsibilities to provide for their children while they are at home and I would add to that, in some instances, while they're leaving home. One is for provision of daily needs for sustenance, and that's something that comes straight out of, again, 1 Timothy. That book is full of that kind of thing. But also saving to provide for future needs, including, and this is something where it's probably a good idea to talk to the kids about, here's how I'm expecting to do this, okay?

But training up a child in the way that he should go occupationally, and maybe other areas as well. This verse here, Proverbs 22, 6, you know, train up a child in the way that he should go in his old age and not depart from it. Many people will take that as a verse, well, I trained up my kid to be a Christian and I put him in a Christian home, how come he's something else, you know? That's not what it's saying, okay? The way that he should go is, how is the kid bent? I don't mean all kids are bent, but what I'm saying is that there is a certain way that the Lord has made them, a certain bias, and you can learn to recognize that as a parent.

Let me give you a for instance. I thought as a father, and my kids were at a stage where they weren't driving yet, that it would be an appropriate thing to sit down with both of my sons and show them, here's how you fix a bicycle. So we're in the garage here, we've got these bicycles upside down, we've got the tool chest open, and so here's how you tune this thing up, and you get this adjusted, and you clean this up, you know. And I'm showing them this stuff, and for a moment, you know, I went off and did something and came back into the garage.

I'd just gone briefly. And then I noticed a very distinct difference between the two. The older one, just all of a sudden, a sort of a far away look came into his eyes. And he put the wrench down and just wandered off. And then the second one had this very intense look, and he was going to town on this thing. That's the one that's a mechanic now.

And so it's a matter of recognizing that bent that they have, that it's the way God made them. And if a parent has a place in recognizing, that's why it's in there, is not to give you some kind of promise that if you train up a kid this way, he won't depart from it. No, it's to tell you, look for that bent that they have. Look for it because you as a parent are going to be wanting to look, how do I encourage that? Train them up according to that, the way that God's made them.

That's what it's about. So there's those financial provisions for the kids. Now, at this stage, that is when the kids are at home, it's fitting for the children to honor their parents by obeying it, obeying parents. This is the Ephesians 6.1 principle here. There's also a need both when children are at home and when they are gone from the home for the parents to have the above-mentioned documents in place. And why would those documents need to be in place for the sake of those kids? Yeah, one of the things that, for example, a will will take care of is here's what those kids get. Nancy and I, for example, had to sit down and talk between us. What happens if the Lord takes the two of us home, but our kids are still here? Where do they go? How are they going to be provided for? What's going to happen?

Believe me, you do not want the state making those decisions. You don't. It may work out well, but it may not. And you don't want to leave that up to the whims of the state. Nancy and I have a friend in Nevada who's gotten in a real complicated legal situation trying to sort out some things that he got himself into. And he had a judge that was extremely biased against anything biblical. This was a very liberal, and I'll say it, lesbian judge. You don't want a judge with that kind of set of values making decisions about where your kids are going to go, right?

So, case in point. All right, now, in the area of finances, children have a responsibility to honor their parents. Notice I changed the word here, to honor their parents as they age in these ways. The care and needs related to their aging or disability, including items covered under the financial and health care powers of attorney and the living will, okay? And that's, again, reason for them to have it in place. Dealing with end of life matters, such as burial, handling of the estate, et cetera. And things related to that.

And it's an ongoing relationship because sometimes the level of care may be minor. Sometimes it's going to mean something more intense. When Nancy's dad had passed away, and her mom was, you know, still at home, there was still some issues to deal with. How do we handle this and that? So she needed some help with some things. As time went on, the help that she needed was more intense.

Just recently, you know, I took a week off so I could go help my folks put on a roof because my dad being in his middle 70s, I don't want him spending hours and hours and hours on the roof, okay? At 50, I'm wondering, but anyway. That's a part of this same kind of responsibility, isn't it? I don't let my mom and dad sit there and tell me, now Vern, you need to do this, that, and the other thing. That's not the point anymore.

But I still need to honor them, and that's one of the ways that I can honor them, even at this stage. Now, at this stage, it's fitting for the adult children to honor their parents in these ways. even though they've left their parents' household, and this is the Genesis 2 principle. Yes, they've left mother and father, okay? They've been joined to his wife, but there's still an ongoing relationship to honor the parents.

Now, a question came up on Wednesday night that I didn't address here and I thought I'd bring up, and that is, What about, for example, is there responsibility with nieces and aunts and uncles? Because all it talks about here is parents and children. And the answer I came back to was this. The consistent priority in Scripture is that there is a parent-child responsibility. That's the first priority.

If that relationship is not there or it's completely broken down, That's where aunts and uncles and nieces and those kinds of relationships can step in. An example, my grandmother was orphaned. Both of her parents died when she was at a very young age. And so as a consequence, her aunt and uncle raised her. And they did a great job of it. They were great substitute parents, if you will.

But that's an instance where the direct lineage was broken by something that obviously is nothing under anybody's control but the Lord's, so that the aunts and uncles or cousins, other family relationships can then step in. The priority responsibility, both as parent and as child, is with the parents. Extended family needs to step in if somehow that's not in place. Okay. The final comments here.

We could go on and on with financial details. The truth is that there's all sorts of financial issues that come up in life. We've talked about everything, savings, and debt, and expenses, and taxes, and giving, and all these different subjects. But in the end, while there's lots of details to consider, I mean, we've looked at all sorts of things here. There's lots of details to consider. In the end, the final analysis is that what this finance area is all about is our beholding the Lord.

We're not going to be able to take any of this stuff with us. Here we've talked for weeks and weeks about finances and we're not going to take any of it with us. I heard this account of this one fellow who had actually made special arrangements with the Lord to take a suitcase full of gold bricks into heaven.

Did you hear about that story? He actually made special arrangements and he got a letter. Don't ask me how. He got a letter authorizing this. He had a suitcase full of gold bricks and a letter of authorization signed by the Lord. He dies and he gets up to heaven's gates and the main guy that's there, you know, was taking a break. And so they had another guy standing there and he looks at this thing and he, what you got there? Nobody comes up with a suitcase.

The guy says, yeah, but I got special permission. They look, see, Lord signed it. Oh, the guy says, well, I guess it's okay to bring it in. The Lord says, it's okay. It's all right. But what on earth are you going to do with chunks of pavement? In the end, you're not going to take any of this stuff. Okay? You're not going to take any of this stuff with you.

So why do we spend week after week after week talking about it? It's only because it is an instrument, and we'll put it this way, it is a significant instrument that the Lord is going to use to conform us to the image of the Son. That's why we talk about it. Not because it's going to last forever, it isn't. But the conforming that he does, that will last. So that's why we talk about it.

What will last forever is our relationship with the Lord. And the eternal relationship that we have with each other because of that. And so the Lord is going to continue to use this area of finances. for eternal purposes. And that's why we talk for week and week and week and week about this subject.

So let me just read for you 2 Corinthians 3.18. But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.

Or Romans 8.28 and 29. And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. For those whom he foreknew, he also predestined to become conformed to the image of his Son, so that he would be the firstborn among many brethren." That conforming process, that growing from glory to glory, is what this is all about. And the world doesn't get it. But what's revealed to us in Scripture, we have that marvelous truth. I've covered lots of things. There's also lots of things I haven't covered, so if you have any questions, Yeah.

It sounds like this Wednesday night class is smarter than us. No. No. What happens is I get to take advantage of their questions and then tell you without you having to ask the questions. So you're smarter. You get to have the questions benefited to you without having to ask them. How about that? Any other questions come up? The only unbenefit they have is that they don't get our questions today. Oh, yes. That's right. Neither do they get the potluck. They've groused and griped about that a few times. Anything else? Okay.

Let's just close in prayer. Obviously, we've covered a lot of subjects, but there's no doubt things that are still going to come up, personal situations that we haven't addressed maybe directly. Feel free to bring them up and we'll talk about them and talk about them at length if we need to. Okay, let's pray.

Lord, we thank you that we have the truth of your word to guide and lead us. We needn't be twisted about, as this world is, by myth and by falsehood. Instead, we have this marvelous truth laid out for us to give us guideposts in this area of finances as we go along the path that you've called us to. And we just pray that you would bring these truths to mind as we go along our way, and we just give you thanks that when it's all done, when it's all said, when all of finances is passed, that we can behold your glorious Son. We just pray this in Jesus' name. Amen.